October 2020
October 2020
Sharing someone’s moment of success, when their hard work, sacrifice, commitment and single-mindedness have brought them the ultimate reward is, for me, quite emotional. When I witness an athlete’s podium moment I feel humble, and inspired to be the best I can be – in whatever I do.
“95% of what it takes to be a champion takes place away from the track.” – Lord Coe, The Winning Mind
As coaches and entrepreneurs we too can plan for our ‘podium moments’ – those moments when we punch the air and think to ourselves, ‘YES! I made it! We did it!’
These moments of celebration or arrival will be different for everyone. Whether it’s the moment you receive your coaching qualification or the first day a website goes live; it could be getting your first paying client or playing a key role in transforming someone’s life. It could even be being recognised and honoured by your peer and fellow coaching community.
When you have an inner drive to succeed, rehearsal and preparation for the main event come as a part of the process for achievement. It’s all about getting READY.
READY
R – Resilience Athletes need to be resilient and have the ability to turn setbacks into comebacks. Coaches and business owners need the same strength of mind to drive through adversity, be flexible with their thinking, take ownership of outcomes and move on.
E – Environment You get to be the best by being with the best. If you want to become really good at something, you need to learn from people who are already good at what they do. Get to know people who are good at what they do, and put yourself in the right environment to achieve.
A – Always Improving All professional athletes know that they need to push and challenge themselves beyond comfortable limits if they are to achieve optimum fitness and gain the chance of becoming the best. The purpose of practice is to improve and refine. What can you practice today, for a better tomorrow? Are you just going through the motions – or are practising, improving and refining yourself and your business all the time?
D – Discipline Does your daily behaviour support or derail you? Those who reach the top in their profession or business have two things in common: they value their time and they are self-disciplined. Discipline is the cornerstone of all other success traits.
Y – You are the driver of your own destiny and your success. What are you planning to DO! to drive your career in the coaching industry forward?
It helps to adopt an Olympian mindset – that combines vision with positive consistent action. We are now an almost ½ way through the year. If you were to step forward to 31 December, what would you be saying when you look back on the year just passed? Will you be saying to yourself, ‘Where did that time go? Doesn’t time fly? Another year has gone.’ Or, will you be celebrating your own podium moments – punching the air with a feeling of euphoria and saying, ‘Wow that was a good year! I did well!’
In the months and the years ahead – what do you want your podium moment(s) to be? Get clear, get focused and you can make it happen!
Coaching within the Education Sector has been transformational as a coach.
Parent coaching, although commonplace in the U.S. is relatively new in the Australia and other parts of the world but is definitely a growing area.
“In my opinion, every parent, family and child are unique and so therefore their challenges are unique to them too, and there isn’t a parenting magic wand! It makes this area of coaching varied, exciting and rewarding”.
When I coach, I initially work to dispel the myth of the “perfect parent” and then move towards a strength based approach to help clients realise that they are doing the best job they can with the tools that they have available to them at the time. Coaching gives parents more tools to do an even better job. Supporting parents to become the parent or family they want to be can be an incredible and rewarding journey! Some of the feedback I’ve received from clients has included the words like…
“Life-changing”, “I feel like a better person for my young person”, “we now communicate and we have fun together, I’m now enjoying my parenting like I never have before”
Many people see parenting as one of the hardest jobs there is, and in some ways, it’s true, however coaching in this area enables you to empower parents to see parenting through a different lens. Helping them to realise that what we focus on we notice more of. As a parent, do they focus on all the things they find irritating and challenging? As a coach, we can help them see their child’s uniqueness and strengths and to become confident in their parental authority through, positive approaches to discipline, good communication and valuing relationships. Coaching also helps parents to have a more coach like approach in their parenting style too.
In this area of coaching I have developed working relationships with local Children’s Centres and my local authority. Parenting is very high on the political agenda, and things are changing in this area all the time, being aware of this I have been able to tap into local government funding to deliver group coaching programmes to many different parents. This work often leads to parents also approaching me for private 1-1 coaching either for themselves or through recommendations to their family and friends.
“Parents will also approach me to coach their children around many aspects of wellbeing, raising aspirations or managing exam stress and empowering their young person to reach their full potential”.
When working regularly in schools, where I am asked to provide coaching workshops for parents on many aspects of parenting support as well as resilience and wellbeing evenings to support schools in developing parental engagement. This has also spun off into other areas of business development where I have been able to provide;
- 1-1 and group coaching with students on a variety of areas around achievement and wellbeing
- Coaching of teaching staff around leadership, wellbeing and managing stress
This area is varied and exciting area to coach within, not least of all because it influences the outcome of the next generation. I feel so passionate about this area of work as I have found that at the center of everything is the child. So, whether you are working with a parent, a teacher or a family support worker, it’s all about the child, which is a very empowering and motivational thing to be influencing.
If you really want to make a difference and make a positive impact on the lives of parents, teachers, young people and inspire the next generation, this area is one I would highly recommend. It’s exciting, rewarding and I truly believe as a coach, the sky is the limit!
7 Simple Ways to Stay Calm and Focussed.
States affect our ability to perform to our best, when under stress our performance can drop by 20-30%. Learning how to manage your state will leave you feeling more in control of the external influences that impact on our general well-being and capability to perform, experiencing both the highs and lows, whilst knowing that you have a choice of how you react to any given experience.
In today’s world, more people are finding it harder to cope with day to day stress. Regardless of occupation, seniority, or salary, we’re spending more of our days feeling drained and out of control, instead of focused and calm.
While some stress is a normal part of the life (which is why resilience is such a great skill to have), high levels of stress can reduce your productivity and have a negative effect on your physical and emotional health. There is another way to think about stress and handle it.
Some common signs and symptoms of excessive job and workplace stress include:
- Feeling anxious, irritable, or depressed
- Apathy, loss of interest in work
- Problems sleeping
- Fatigue
- Trouble concentrating
- Muscle tension or headaches
- Stomach problems
- Social withdrawal
- Using alcohol or drugs to cope etc.
Time to change
Another way of thinking about stress management is “state management”. In NLP the term “state” is used to describe our way of being at any moment. It is made up of our physiology, thoughts and feelings, and is greater than the sum of its parts.
States are the most immediate part of our experience; they vary in intensity, length and familiarity. There is good news, our state changes throughout the day, meaning it is impossible to stay in any stuck state for very long.
States affect our ability to perform to our best, when under stress our performance can drop by 20-30%. Learning how to manage your state will leave you feeling more in control of the external influences that impact on our general well-being and capability to perform, experiencing both the highs and lows, whilst knowing that you have a choice of how you react to any given experience.
- Change Your Thinking
Think of a time when you felt the way you want to feel. Associate with the experience; be there again, seeing out of your own eyes, feel the positive feelings.
- Change Your Physiology
Change your posture, adopting a positive posture will make you feel calmer. Smile, this simple act makes you feel happier, because when you smile you release the body’s natural feel good chemicals in the brain.
- Move
Exercising will release the body’s natural mood enhancing chemicals beta-endorphins, which are powerful mood enhancers.
- Change Your Breathing
Breathing more deeply and taking twice as long to breath out than breathing in will have a calming effect, breath in for a count of 6 and out for a count of 12.
- Relax Your Muscles
Relax the shoulders and muscles in the face and neck will help you to feel calm.
- Eat
Food is psychoactive, so eating will change your state. Be careful as this is not a long-term answer and continuous eating will lead to weight gain.
- Use a Resource Anchor
These are physical anchors set up on the body and are associated with positive experiences.
“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” Dalai Lama
We are very aware that looking into training providers is awfully confusing. It doesn’t help that we all sound similar too, does it?
I have attached a snapshot of what you should be looking at when considering embarking on this journey to help you short list your options.
- Nationally Recognised Training by a Registered Training Organisation with an RTO number is important as the regulatory body is ASQA which gives you peace of mind as a student that it is a recognised program with a real qualification.
- If it has International Accreditation (ICF is the only legit international regulatory body that oversees coaching worldwide) – Ensure that have the ACTP level which put you on a direct pathway to their PCC level of credentialling.
Why is this important? ICF ACTP Accredited coaches are seen to be elite. They have the experience behind them to charge more for their services and to be part of a bigger regulated community.
What is Credentialing?
ICF Credential-holders are part of a self-regulating group of elite coaches who provide accountability to clients and the coaching profession as a whole. They pursue and complete rigorous education and practice requirements that provide unquestioned legitimacy to their commitment to excellence in coaching.
Credentialled coaches show their wealth of experience by the levels they reach.
Global recognition is understood that you are the best option for clients based on the high level of training you have committed to.
The Link below is interesting to look at as many clients are going through the ICF to find clients.
https://coachfederation.org/credentialed-coach-finder
The most efficient pathway to credentialing as an ICF Professional Certified Coach (PCC) is as follows:
- Complete an ICF ACTP program. Ours is called the Professional Coach ICF (PC-ICF).
- Log 100 hours of coaching (75 hours paid by at least 8 clients and 25 hours unpaid)
- Apply for credentialing which will require you to do a Coaching Knowledge Assessment (CKA) which is a multiple choice questionnaire that we prepare you for.
- This will result in you being credentialed as an Associate Certified Coach (ACC).
- Your then require to build you logged coaching hours to 500 hours (440 paid by at least 25 clients and 60 hours pro-bono)
- As our PC-ICF ACTP program is accredited for 189 Coach Specific Training Hours (CSTH) you will not be required to do any additional training for this credentialing which requires 180 CSTH.
- This will result in you being credentialed as a Professional Certified Coach (PCC).
Start logging your Coaches hours immediately upon enrolment into an ACTP Accredited program.
- Find an ICF ACTP Accredited Training Provider: https://apps.coachfederation.org/eweb/DynamicPage.aspx?webcode=TPSS
Whenever someone asks how you are, how do you reply? “I’m great!”, “I’m fab, thanks!” or something else equally as positive and enthusiastic? Or is it more often the case that you reply with “I’m ok”, “I’m getting there”, or “Not bad”? If we’re being honest with ourselves, many of us tend towards the latter. Why? Because we’re settling for lives that are less happy than they could be.
What is happiness?
Happiness doesn’t necessarily mean long-term fulfilment – you might be a long way from feeling fulfilled in life, but you’re fully capable of happiness along the way. In fact, happiness is just one of the things that fuels us during this journey, and it’s something that can be found absolutely anywhere. You could find it in a song, a social interaction, an activity, or an achievement. It’s an emotion that makes us better, more positive and more satisfied people. It shouldn’t be considered a luxury, or an elusive thing – rather, something that we’re entitled to, and should therefore pursue.
Your song
So how do we find the things that make us truly happy, to the point of making our souls sing? And how do we keep that momentum going in our day-to-day lives? Here’s how:
• Finding your passions: Whether it’s volunteering at a dog shelter or taking part in charity events, it’s commonly agreed that the happiest people do things that give their lives meaning – but that isn’t a concrete rule. When was the last time you felt on cloud 9, just by doing something you love? It could be as simple as watching your favourite movie with a takeaway, or sitting in your garden with a good book, or taking a walk somewhere new and inspiring. Or dancing. Or running. You don’t have to be doing something extraordinary to feel extraordinarily happy – as per the old adage: it’s often the ‘little things’ that count. Whether it’s big or little, dig deep into your mind and find out what your true passion is (and if you’ve got more than one, even better). Absolutely everyone has something they love doing.
• Don’t be scared: Fear is something that holds us back in many areas of life – but only if we let it. Sometimes, our passions turn out to be things we haven’t tried before, so it’s important to be open-minded and willing to experience new things. The majority of times our fears are unfounded, so don’t let them stand between you and potential elation. If you don’t go for it, you’ll never know.
• Immerse yourself: So many of us make our passions take a back seat, using that all too common excuse: a lack of time. Granted, when you have a busy lifestyle it can feel impossible to ‘indulge’ in the things that make you happy. But this is the problem – being happy shouldn’t be viewed as an indulgence. Your happiness should be as much of a priority as your physical health. No one lies on their deathbed wishing they’d spent more time cleaning their home, pulling weeds, or working. In fact, they usually wish the opposite: that they’d spent more time enjoying the things and people that make them happy instead, passions included.
• Commit to your happiness: It’s very easy to immerse yourself in your passion for a brief period, before letting life take over again and pushing it back to the side-lines. Instead, make a solid commitment to yourself. Schedule your ‘you time’ and make any necessary arrangements in advance – even draw up a contract for yourself if you think it’ll help. Make your passion a permanent fixture in your life for as long as you feel that it makes your soul sing.
• Listen to your soul: Humans have an innate need to pursue the things that not only keep them happy on a physical level, but on an emotional one too. So long as they’re not detrimental in any way, it doesn’t matter whether your passions are productive, profitable, worthwhile in society, or even a ‘sensible’ use of your time. All that matters is that they leave you feeling satisfied, glad to be alive, and glad to be you.
Enjoying ‘me time’ and immersing yourself in what you love isn’t just a momentary fix either – it has long-term benefits too. In time you’ll feel happier, more positive and more optimistic – and when life does become testing, you’ll always have that passion to retreat to, and an opportunity to remind yourself that life can feel absolutely wonderful.
What lies behind the power of group coaching? Whether you are managing a team in your business, or you are part of a team in a company and even when you think about your friend group, a good team cohesion is essential in our lives. Ann Skidmore has been coaching teams throughout her career and in this article, she’s sharing her thoughts on coaching groups. Enjoy!
‘Deep conversations with the right people are priceless’
Working in teams is a daily practice in organisations. Well-functioning teams can return big benefits to morale, strategic thinking, creativity and the bottom line.
Our first experience of teamwork is often through sports. A group of talented people are put together and expected to collaborate to beat another team. In reality, what happens is the team has to rally around the ‘stars’ to help them to win for the team.
Teamworking in organisations is different.
Most of us have not been trained in what that means, let alone how to get the best out of our teams. Team members are not meant to be stars, standing out alone, but working together collaborating and contributing to the greater success of the whole organisation. Just like in a sports team, business teams need coaching and mentoring to raise the bar, enhance their performance and create high performances for the whole organisation.
This means from the most senior team, the Executive Board, downwards, all line managers/leaders need to enhance and develop their coaching and mentoring skills. Most leaders/managers have not had the specific training for this and that’s why organisations increasingly are seeking facilitated development and coaching programmes to deliver these skills for their senior managers/leaders.
In addition, right now, leaders are facing the challenge of leading and managing their teams more frequently in a virtual, online environment.
Some of the biggest challenges of virtual teams include:
- Trust – we are either building it or diminishing it – it is never static
- Misunderstandings from poor communication
- Variations in perception as to how people sense ownership and commitment to tasks and responsibilities
- Empathy and personal connection due to physical distancing between team members
Leaders need to be able to confidently address each of these issues as part of the ongoing process that leads to higher productivity for the whole business. Coaching and mentoring skills, plus tools and techniques enable all employees to raise their awareness and generate more responsibility for taking action.
The ‘Group or Team Coaching’ helps bring a closer understanding of what Group/Team coaching is, their similarities and differences. Virtual teams and their leaders are hiring coaches to help them to manage the physical distancing they are currently experiencing.
If you aren’t already coaching or leading teams, why not join us and find out more about whether you would like to get involved in this exciting area.
Just recently with many of my business clients, I have found they want to understand how best to lead their teams right now.
‘At a time of crisis and uncertainty, good leadership really matters’ Chartered Management Institute 2020
They are finding the constantly changing world that they operate in frustrating, challenging, tiring and at times, physically and emotionally draining. Recently, when one of my clients was explaining how exhausting everything was for them and how they couldn’t find even a few minutes ‘just for myself’, I asked a question:
‘What’s good about this situation for you, right now?’
Needless to say, they looked at me astonished! The point is, sometimes our clients (and we ourselves do too) can get lost in their experiences and stories of what is going on for them. As coaches and human beings, we need to find a way to interrupt the pattern of the story, otherwise, the story gets repeated over and over again.
Once my client got over their astonishment, they identified 5 aspects of what was good about this situation and what they were learning about themselves, their team and also about their business and how resilient it was at managing the current crisis.
More than that, they realised that they were growing as a leader by managing their entire team remotely. No one had trained them for this role, they were learning ‘on the job’ and doing ok at it too, they thought. Then I asked:
‘What achievements are you proud of that you have gained as a result of going through these challenging times?’
They smiled and realised that there were indeed some achievements that could only have been achieved by going through tough times. They didn’t know what they were capable of until now.
We were on a roll now! I asked them:
‘As a leader, what will you look back on when you reflect on 2020. What did you learn this year that you couldn’t have learnt in any other year so far?’
Giving them the time, space and the silence to think out loud were the most important things I could do for them and with them.
Being a coach is a privilege, our clients share their innermost thoughts and feelings, and trust us to listen. We do our best to understand and help them to be able to take action towards their goals.
We too are demonstrating leadership, listening well, being compassionate, having a vision for a better future, building trust between us and our clients.
Being a leader is a role, showing leadership is a behaviour.
Joyce Diebels is a mindset coach. She helps women in creating better eating habits so that they feel better and healthier in their bodies and skin. Through her holistic and unique method of NLP & EFT she connects body, mind and spirit to find and change the root cause of eating and body image problems. Women will be more confident, energetic and in balance. She also specialised in helping women with overeating and eating disorders, as well as women struggling with hypothyroidism and PCOS.
Qualifications: Professional Coach ICF with NLP Coach Practitioner Program – Life Coaching Academy (2019/2020) NLP Practitioner with Kain Ramsay (2020) EFT & TFT Tapping Practitioner with The Priority Academy (2020) CERT IV & Diploma in Human Resources Management and Services with Rhodes College Melbourne (2019-2020) Master’s Degree in Corporate Communication with University of Amsterdam (2012-2013) Communication with University of North Carolina at Charlotte (2012) Bachelor in Communication Science with Radboud University Nijmegen (2009-2012)
Contact Information: (044) 963-2424 |
As human beings, it’s safe to say many of us can often spend far too much time overthinking our problems within our lives. It is a huge challenge and across the board, we’re forced to stop and ponder over various key points; whether it be work, home, relationship or personally related. In fact, around 95% of us fall into this trap to some degree, according to considerable research by Dr Piers Steel, a Psychologist at the University of Calgary and the world’s foremost authority on procrastination.
Procrastination is more than just a waste of our own resources. Research has shown that persistent worry, over-thinking and ‘holding back’ can damage your happiness, your health and lower your self-esteem. It can even ruin your career, reputation and relationships with the people you love.
Such vacillation comes into play when our negative thoughts talk us into engaging in anything other than the task we know we should be completing. The more negative emotions we apply to a certain task, the more likely we are to waver and delay positive responses; thus even possibly talking ourselves into making completely the wrong decision.
Persistent avoidance of targeting problems via procrastination is a deeply rooted pattern of behaviour and this cannot be resolved overnight. However, as with most habits, it can be changed over time. Consistent practice in positively changing our thoughts or beliefs can go a long way towards the best possible chance of succeeding.
These below steps could be a great starting point to encourage serial overthinkers to a more positive path in problem solving. We hope you enjoy and find this infographic useful.
Resilience is the ability to bounce back, recover and grow from life’s adversities. Those who are resilient are able to cope with stress more effectively and maintain a positive outlook on their circumstances. Research has shown that whilst some are naturally resilient these behaviours can be developed.
If you want to learn some ways that you can boost your resilience, below are 9 ways that can help:
1. Strengthen your belief in your abilities
According to research one of the most important factors in recovering from difficult events and coping with stress stems from self-esteem. Having a higher level of self-esteem enables you to become more confident in your abilities to respond and deal with stressful situations. Some ways that you can strengthen your levels of self-belief include making a list of your strengths and accomplishments and keeping this list somewhere you can see it every day, choosing not to say negative things about yourself and being your own cheerleader instead and keeping promises that you’ve made to yourself so you don’t let yourself down.
2. Nurture yourself
Often when we are stressed it can be easy to neglect our needs, losing sleep, not eating properly or taking care of our overall wellbeing can be common responses to stress. Enhancing your self-nurturing skills by taking time out for yourself to do activities that you enjoy such as taking time to get outdoors, going for a walk in the park, meditation, exercise classes or pampering days are all effective ways that you can take a break from whatever the situation is so that you can take care of your needs which can help you to feel ready to face any challenge that life may throw your way.
3. Embrace change
An essential part of resilience is the ability to adapt to change. The more flexible you are the better equipped you’ll be at responding to circumstances which may be beyond your control. Resilient people understand that in order to evolve, embracing change is fundamental as it allows them to open up to opportunities, branch out in new directions and thrive. A great way to embrace change is to take small steps outside of your comfort zone; you could try new cuisines, a new route to work, new activities or learn new skills all of which can help you to feel more comfortable with change.
4. Reflect on your past experiences
Reminding yourself of the experiences in your past which have shaped you into being a stronger person can help you to keep things in perspective and reinforce the belief that if you could get through that experience, you can get through these ones too. Making a list of all the events that you have overcome and have made you a stronger person can act as a great source of comfort in moments that you may feel overwhelmed.
5. Show Kindness
Having a sense of connection to something meaningful can help us to continue driving forwards in the midst of a challenge. Choosing to show kindness by lending someone a helping hand, taking part in activities within your local community, doing something for charity even if it’s simply taking a bag of clothes to the local charity shop or giving someone some genuine praise or a compliment are all ways that can help you to show kindness to others and help you to feel more connected to others.
6. Develop a solid circle of support
When you have a solid circle of caring and supportive people in your life, you’re more likely to have people who you can confide in, share your feelings with and brainstorm possible solutions to your challenges with. Sometimes all you need to make your day brighter is a good catch-up with a friend.
- Set Goals
Having goals to work towards can help you to sustain your motivation to continue pushing ahead and feel a sense of accomplishment when you achieve them. Resilient people are able to set goals and take the steps to achieve them; doing so helps them to get comfortable with change and strengthens their ability to overcome any possible obstacles along the way.
8. Enhance your problem solving skills
Research has shown that those with the ability to come up with solutions to problems tend to cope better with challenges than those who don’t. If you want to enhance your problem solving abilities you can approach situations with ‘how’ and ‘what’ questions such as ‘how can I improve this situation? Or ‘what can I do to change things for the better?’ When you train your mind to start directing its thoughts towards powerful questions it can help you to think of potential ways that you can solve a problem, you could also list the solutions you’ve brainstormed onto a piece of paper to remind you of the steps you can take should a similar challenge occur in the future.
- Look for the silver lining
Sometimes when you are going through a dark period it can be difficult to remain optimistic but directing your thoughts to focus on the positives in your life helps you to take the lesson from the situation, know that just as the good times don’t last, the bad times don’t either and this knowledge can enhance your skills to combat any challenges that fly your way. When you remain hopeful about a brighter future it moves you one step closer to getting to it.
People only become resilient by having to deal with setbacks it’s a part of the process, reminding yourself that you will find a way over it, around it or through it as well as remembering that this will pass because things always do, can help you to become more comfortable with overcoming setbacks and maintaining a positive outlook.
Keeping a daily journal might seem like something for famous thinkers, or even angsty teenagers. However, in an increasingly digital age, taking the time out to put pen to paper and record our experiences, feelings, gratitude and dreams is a powerful tool for personal development.
When people are struggling with stress, depression, or anxiety, journaling can be a powerful tool to improve their mental health. It’s a great way to gain control of your emotions and connect with yourself.
Keeping a daily journal can have a surprising impact on your mental health. Below we list some of the main benefits.
1. Help clarify your thoughts and feelings
It is difficult to think through a situation clearly when your thoughts become muddled, chaotic and confusing. Taking a few minutes to sit down and write them down is a great way clarify your thoughts and to stop circular thinking and negative thought patterns in their tracks.
2. Manage stress and anxiety
Writing down our fears and anxieties can help release the intense emotion surrounding them. By describing them to yourself in a safe, neutral space that is outside your own mind, you can become clearer about these emotions. In doing so, you stop them from weighing you down and take steps towards letting them go.
3. Practise gratitude
While unloading negative emotions and clearing them from your mind is part of journaling, the process can also include practicing gratitude. By including a section, either at the start or end of your journal with all the things, people and experiences you are thankful for. Taking time out of your day to practise gratitude has a powerful and positive impact on your mental health.
4. Recognise triggers and thought patterns
According to psychologist Barbara Markway, ‘there’s simply no better way to learn about your thought processes than to write them down.’ To challenge unhealthy thought processes and patterns we first need to understand what these are. Keeping a daily journal is a proven way to recognise triggers, thought patters and automatic self-talk and get to the root of any negative emotions or anxieties surrounding them.
5. Learn to be honest and true to yourself
A journal is a safe place for your deepest and most intimate thoughts. By expressing yourself freely and authentically every day, you are practising an honest and true internal communication. With time this internal monologue will radiate outwards, enabling you to live a life that is true to you.
A daily journal is a powerful tool which allows you to step outside of your chaotic schedule and focus wholly on yourself. It’s a chance to unwind and decompress from negative experiences or thoughts, whilst also creating time to acknowledge our gratitude and achievements of the day. Through reflective journaling you can understand yourself better, helping you to strive to live your best life.
Friday rocks!
Why?
Because it symbolizes the end of the workweek and kick-starts the weekend. No matter if you’re in college or at work, knowing that the weekend is just around the corner simply feels good. When it’s only a couple of hours until you finally get your deserved break from a tough week, life almost miraculously looks a lot brighter. Even more so, once you’re done with all your work on Friday, you can probably look back at all that you’ve accomplished throughout the week. Friday also introduces 2 ½ days filled with joy, happiness, and a lot of time to relax. In fact, who doesn’t like Fridays when they introduced the prospect of a fulfilling and awesome weekend? Because Friday is such an awesome day, we’ve created the following collection of funny and happy Friday quotes. These are the quotes that celebrate Friday as the best day of the week.
After a tiring and stressful week at work or college, Friday introduces a welcome change. Instead of having to get up ridiculously early in the morning, you can party late and sleep in.
Let’s face it, we all enjoy this feeling of finally walking out the door of our workplaces or colleges. It’s a relieving moment when you can leave all the stress and burdens of your day-to-day life behind – at least for a couple of days.
Fridays are quite special. Just look around and you’ll notice that almost everyone you meet is in a much better mood. After all, the weekend is only hours ahead.
One of the greatest challenges we all face is managing our own internal emotional state, especially in difficult situations. How do you deal with challenges? Do you like your friends to console you? Do you feel the boil of anger rise followed by a verbal or physical outburst or do you throw yourself head first into activity to stop you from thinking about the difficult situation?
In NLP, there is no such thing as an un-resourceful person, just an un-resourceful state. Being able to manage your state so that you are able to remain resourceful even in the most challenging situations is clearly something that is of huge value wherever you work, whatever you do and whoever you are!
Whatever task you have to perform, whatever you want the outcome to be, ask yourself – “what state do I want to be in to make this easy?”
If you do want to or need to change your state in order to help you perform at your optimum level then there are many ways to do so using NLP techniques.
To get you started, here are 3 easy ways to help you manage your emotional state:
1. Focus
Change the pictures you are creating for yourself – not just what you are picturing, but how you are picturing it. Change the sounds you can hear, become more aware and zone in for the best picture possible. Ever noticed what happens if you’re feeling low or a bit off centre and then you hear your favourite piece of uplifting music? Change the sounds and how you imagine your end result to be.
2. Physiology
Change your body radically – Move, do anything that pushes different chemicals around your nervous system whether this could be doing more exercise or simply taking the stairs instead of the lift. Change your posture, stand tall, high and successful, not only will you look confident, but you’ll feel more confident. Consider changing your facial expression too and your breathing, even the smallest amends will help you manage your state.
3. Self-Talk
Change your internal dialogue or self-talk. You can change the content or the language of your mind chatter, so you become your own champion. How about changing your internal critic that tells you you’re not good enough? Imagine how funny you might find it if your inner critic had the voice of Mickey Mouse or the Donkey from Shrek? Or move the location of the voices so it comes from your left big toe!
All states are caused by the interaction between your thinking patterns, your physiology and your neurochemicals. Changing any of these can influence your state.
The ability to change your state and choose how you feel is one of the skills for emotional freedom and a happy life. Emotional freedom does not mean never feeling negative but does mean you are more aware of negative states and can choose your response.
There are many ways in which people can develop the self-awareness to effectively manage their states. This is just one of the many powerful techniques in NLP to help you perform at your best no matter what is going on in your environment.
Want to discover more about how to drive your peak performance with NLP?
“What is an absolute must for a space for young people to run successfully?”
It’s a question I’m often asked in my career as youth worker, young person’s coach and mentor. This time, the question was directed at me by my line manager, who was conducting a Youth Team reflection session.
“Hmmm,” I mused as my face contorted with deep thought. I was two months into my new career, and I’d had a challenging few months trying different ways to get young people to open up to and engage in conversations about important topics that shape their identities and lives.
Then came the lightbulb moment: “They have to be fun!” I exclaimed.
Fun, is something done for enjoyment, amusement, or light-hearted pleasure. Take a moment to think of something you do that fits this description. Got something? Did you find it hard? If this took you a while, don’t despair. The world we live in has a way of stripping away our inner child and we struggle to “find the time” to run around and play. Or perhaps we don’t think that fun or ‘play’ have places in our adult lives.
So, what does this have to do with the Coaching within Education?
From my experience of coaching, mentoring and working with young people, partaking in activities or centering conversations around what they do for fun has been my route into their world. It has become my foundation block for building rapport, connection and encouraging a trusting relationship. Other side effects have included reconnecting with my playful side, increased health and wellbeing and a lot more laughter in my life!
The science is simple. If you’re having fun with someone, you feel good. If you’re feeling good there’s a pretty good chance you’ll like the person you’re with at that moment. With time, we begin to trust and listen to what these people have to say. Getting to this point takes time, energy and patience, but it’s something that cannot not be skipped. With reference to Stephen Covey: if you’ve got three hours to chop down a tree, spend two of them sharpening the saw, and see how easy the final hour is.
I once worked with a 13-year-old boy whose mum had come to me for support. I asked her what he did for fun to which she replied, “He’s always outside on the trampoline trying to do flips.” And that’s exactly where we have our first session, outside on the trampoline. I found out what he enjoyed most about jumping up and down trying to do backflips, what else he wanted to try to learn, and what he’d been finding difficult: I found out his motivations, his goals, and his fears!
For the next few sessions we focused on figuring out the process for him to be able to do a back flip without the trampoline. Each week we spoke about his progress, what he’d learnt and what the next step was. You might be wondering what all this had to do with his wider life, but when the time was right I transferred all of this and placed it into a scenario he was currently finding difficult. In this instance, it was problems he was currently having with a teacher in school. I then used the hypothetical situation of ‘the backflip’ to frame a discussion about this challenge. Guess what, he spoke openly and confidently because I was now speaking in a language he understood. The time spent building the right communication paths through having fun led to this activity being my method of exploring bigger, underlying life topics.
This learning point and coaching example, amongst many others, inspired the content I have put together for the training day.
We will be focusing on some basic yet vital aspects of the application of coaching young people: getting to know them, building trust, and the use of tools and guidance. What I will be presenting has been the core building blocks for me to create successful relationships with the young person I’m coaching, and for them to value the space provided.
At the heart of the training day, and these three steps, will be the importance of making the coaching process fun, how working together collectively is better than working in isolation, working through practical activities that promote a proactive approach to a young person’s mental and emotional health and wellbeing, and how to apply this to your own approach as a coach.
Be ready to discuss, engage, listen and most importantly, have fun!
Have you ever had thought to yourself, ‘I don’t have time to tidy the whole kitchen before work so I won’t do any of the dishes,’ – only arrive home exhausted and further stressed out by the prospect of cooking dinner and clearing up from the morning? Or have you ever self-generated stress by starting more projects than you’ve finished? Or do you complain about other people’s gossiping when you need to make the same change in your own life?
If these scenarios strike a chord with you, then you can understand what it is like to sabotage yourself.
Self-sabotage is any behaviour or thought process that interferes with your long-standing goals and overall wellbeing. It might seem like an issue with a simple solution: if you realise you’re holding yourself back, simply tell yourself to cut it out. However, the reality is that self-sabotage is deeply rooted in our thought processes and behaviour.
Where does self-sabotage come from?
Self-sabotage occurs when your conscious mind is at odds with your subconscious mind, this disconnect manifests itself in sabotaging behaviour. From procrastinating until you miss deadlines, to working so hard that you completely neglect any self-care, or picking a fight with your partner instead of daring to be vulnerable and explaining your hurt feelings – self-sabotage behaviour is ultimately your subconscious way of preventing pain or confronting fear. These behaviours often cause shame and lower your sense of worth, creating a cycle of self-sabotage and low self-esteem.
With the right tools, though, everyone can reconcile these internal spirals and move forward with positive goals and behaviours that align with them.
1. Understand your unconscious mind
In order to stop self-sabotage, you first need to understand and draw out what is causing this behaviour in the first place. Ask yourself:
– What goals have you had for yourself for a long time and never achieved?
– What do you constantly struggle with for no obvious reason?
– Do you suffer from a lack of motivation in certain areas of your life?
– How does stress manifest in your life?
– Are there any patterns in your fears about yourself or your life that continually pop up?
– What are some triggers for you?
Take time to delve into these questions and use them as prompts to explore your goals and potential limiting beliefs or triggers with more depth and clarity. This process might bring up some unexpected emotions so take your time and be sure to explore these parts of yourself with kindness.
2. Get comfortable confronting your fears
Imagine what it would be like to achieve a long-held dream and personal goal. Think about every step you take towards this goal and whilst doing so write down any negative emotions or fears. Where are they coming from? Do they always come up at a certain point or around a certain emotion? The key to your self-sabotage is within these fears and the best way to move past them is to confront them head-on. Different strategies will work for different people, however, overwhelmingly it is about stepping out of your comfort zone and pushing yourself to stand up to unrealistic fears, to confront realistic fears with solutions and ultimately, zap your sabotaging behaviour.
3. Practice kindness and find self-care time
Unlearning negative thoughts, beliefs and behaviours is an intense journey and shame can exacerbate and prolong it. Therefore, it is important to practise kindness with yourself along the way and invest in well-deserved self-care time. Self-love is never selfish and caring for yourself is never indulgent. With kindness and care, you will be able to move forward past self-sabotage.
The truth is we are all capable of undermining our own goals. Most of us are hardwired with a pesky set of limiting beliefs that act as fuel to self-sabotaging behaviour. In order to overcome self-sabotage you must invest time in some serious self-reflection, as at its core, it is about confronting the beliefs, thought processes and triggers that are causing this subconscious behaviour to occur. Once you have done this you are free to understand yourself deeper and move forward towards your goals.
Bravery isn’t only for people we think of as heroes – those who save lives or climb the highest mountain they can find.
It’s also needed for everyday life, for those times when we stretch to express a strength and a courage we didn’t know we had. It’s a resource we draw on whenever we deal with a crisis, take action to better our lives, stand up to stop an injustice or stand up for our opinions and for others.
Bravery is often needed to meet the challenges of creating change in our lives. It can be nerve wracking to interview for a bigger job than we’ve had in the past. It can be challenging to start exercising, start your own business, speak in public or end a relationship.
Common life scenarios can feel risky and scary to commit to which is why bravery is required.
Stepping out of our comfort zone can be scary at times, the unknown and unfamiliar will often leave people a bit anxious. After all, when we do stay where we’ve always been, there’s much less chance of making a mistake or feeling we’ve failed. Even though change can bring real growth and aliveness, it also takes courage!
The moment we choose growth over the familiar, we’ve gone out on a limb. We’ve set our bravery into motion.
Being brave can be the door to a new beginning. It raises our adrenaline and gives us a sense of excitement to explore new skills and interests, new places, new relationships. It’s a way of saying to ourselves ‘I believe in you’. It can also be a way of saying ‘Yes’ to a greater vision of ourselves.
Finding the courage to take action despite our fears is in itself is a real moment of growth no matter the outcome. It tells us we are capable of exploring and taking a chance for the betterment of our own lives.
In being brave, it’s natural to feel out of your comfort zone and you may feel a sense of “lack of support” in approaching the unfamiliar. You may even question whether you’ve got the strength to deal with this new stress / situation and this is exactly the time to tap in to the many resources which can help you process and deal with the new challenge of being brave.
The support of friends, a life coach, therapist or a support group can be invaluable during these times. They will have an objectivity about your situation that you may lack at first. They can also remind you of your own strength and resiliency.
3 questions to ask yourself to help you feel brave and ready to face new situations:
1. What if you knew you couldn’t fail? List 5 things you would do right now if you knew you couldn’t fail …
2. What obstacles are holding you back from achieving your dreams?
3. Who or what could be your support as you create change or cope with some new challenges in your life?
“Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you’re scared to death.” – Harold Wilson
For people with a strong empathic side, like coaches, setting boundaries is a vital skill to learn and practice.
Here are our 5 tips to help you set healthy boundaries in your life:
1. Get clear on your priorities
The first step to setting healthy boundaries is getting clear on what you need and what you want. Reflect on the boundaries already in place and what’s missing from them.
Figure out what you need from various relationships and in various environments and then communicate them to other people.
2. Do it clearly, firmly, and in a few words as possible
Your boundaries are your non-negotiables so don’t start negotiating them. State them respectfully, gracefully and firmly – there is no need to explain.
Keep the focus on yourself through ‘I statements’. For example, instead of telling your clients ‘You have to stop calling me in the evening’, tell them that ‘I need time for myself and my family in the evenings so I won’t be checking my messages’.
3. If setting boundaries feels uncomfortable for you, practice them
For many who are not used to setting healthy boundaries, this process will feel uncomfortable in the beginning. For people who tend to put others first, you might even feel guilty or ashamed, to begin with. For others, you might fear rejection or confrontation.
Don’t expect perfection from the start but practice saying your boundaries. Make a list and practice them alone by articulating them out loud. And then practice on others, step by step, starting with the smallest things.
Learning to set healthy boundaries is a skill that takes time so allow yourself space to practice, to make mistakes and do it at your own pace.
4. Decide on consequences ahead of time
A boundary without consequence is just a threat.
This means that when setting boundaries, it is important to explicitly state why they are important, and then following through with them. If you decide ahead of time on the consequences, it is more likely you can think them through and then follow through if needed. Otherwise, the boundaries will not be effective.
5. Remember, you are only responsible for setting your boundaries respectfully, not how the others will react
You are only responsible for communicating your boundaries clearly, you’re not responsible for the reaction of the other person. False responsibility leads to all kinds of shame and guilt, and the first step is to recognize it and accept it. So say it again, loud and proud.
You are not responsible for other people’s reaction.
Appropriate boundaries look different for each of us in different environments but it’s important to set boundaries in all aspects of your life.
Finally, as important as it is to set your own boundaries, it’s just as important to respect other people’s boundaries. We’re all dealing with unprecedented challenges, stresses and changes. Respect is a two-way street and appreciating the boundaries others have set for themselves is part of it.
Want to learn how to help others set successful boundaries and empower people?
Take your first step towards a rewarding & fulfilling Coaching journey with The Life Coaching Academy
Whilst it may seem like coaching has only recently become very popular, a global study recently conducted by the International Coach Federation the industry’s largest trade association estimated 53,300 active professional coaches worldwide, generating nearly $2 billion in annual revenue with continual year on year growth.
With the changes in the economic climate, more and more people are starting to explore additional career options that can bend with the twists and turns that we’re taking as a society and coaching fits the bill making it one of the fastest growing business models in the world today.
As a society many peoples values have changed and as a result more and more of us are craving flexibility, fulfilment and to do something meaningful with our lives. Many want to create a work-life balance and have financial security. Life coaching as a career not only provides us with an opportunity to live a better life but more and more people are starting to turn to coaches for assistance with their own life transitions, whether it be a divorce, a change of job, better health or having the courage to pursue their passion. As well as personal and life coaching many corporate companies are continuing to see the benefits of coaching in assisting employees with relationships, teamwork and job satisfaction resulting in fewer sick days and less employee turnover which provides a significant return on investment.
Many are starting to see the value and benefit of coaching and so they are willing to pay for coaches to fill their needs. Coaching is a career that allows you to work in alignment with your values in any industry that you’ve had experience in or have a passion for.
How much you can expect to earn as a coach?
You can make a living by making a positive and lasting difference to others – here’s how:
This is an illustration of your earning potential as a coach on a part time basis.
Coaching Session | Hourly Rate | Sessions per month | Income per month | Income per year |
Average | on Average | |||
2 Sessions per Week | $ 100.00 | 8 | $ 800.00 | $ 9,600.00 |
4 Sessions per Week | $ 100.00 | 16 | $ 1,600.00 | $ 19,200.00 |
10 Sessions per Week | $ 100.00 | 40 | $ 4,000.00 | $ 48,000.00 |
20 Sessions per Week | $ 100.00 | 80 | $ 8,000.00 | $ 96,000.00 |
25 Sessions per Week | $ 100.00 | 100 | $ 10,000.00 | $ 120,000.00 |
Coaching Jobs
Coaching now takes place in 86% of organisations with the primary objective to support performance management.
Most of our graduates go on to run their own coaching business on a full or part time basis and some use their new-found coaching skills to enhance the jobs they currently do.
We have had coaches qualify with us over the years that have successfully set up their own coaching businesses varying from:
- Business Coaching
- Career Coaching
- Youth Coaching
- Parent Coaching
- Corporate Coaching
- Financial Coaching
- Wellness Coaching
- Confidence Coaching
- Life Coaching
- Relationship Coaching
If you knew something influenced virtually everything you did or said, would you want to learn more about it? Would you want to develop it? Let’s face it – many of us are stuck sometimes with fear, boredom, sadness, annoyance or anger. Many of us cannot adapt to changing situations. Many of us struggle to connect and maintain personal and professional relationships.
Many of us cannot show love and appreciation for ourselves, our families, our colleagues and our communities. We all know that emotions are a fundamental part of who we are, and of living and working with others. Yet, we’re been conditioned to believe that emotions (negative) are just the distraction to our lives. In fact, emotions have immense practical value in helping us be more adaptable and ultimately more successful. Emotions navigate us: the more we know them, the more we understand their message.
When we feel sadness, we don’t have time for joy, when we feel bored we cannot feel acceptance. And we all know when our needs are satisfied – we feel joy in our life.
Emotional Intelligence (EI) is the ability to understand ourselves, know what drives us, accurately see how others perceive us, and understand how we relate to others.
In other words, emotional intelligence is a skill or ability to identify and manage the emotions of oneself, of others and of groups. Signs of poor emotional intelligence include the inability to listen to others, defensiveness, unawareness of our own feelings and how we come across, lack of sensitivity to others’ feelings, inability to show empathy, make friends and to deal constructively with conflict, a drive to control others, narcissism, poor motivation and the need to have our own way.
The good news is that we can develop our emotional intelligence, which will help us understand and better deal with our challenges and problems, build strong personal and professional relationships, succeed at work and achieve our goals.
Here are the 3 most important rules:
- If you want to organise your life, you must understand and have access to your emotions. It is important to work on your own emotional awareness and sensitivity.
- If you want to move forward, you need to know where we you are now and where you want to be. You really need a road map, or a plan or a goal. We all live in a world that is constantly changing and more demanding, and without a map, a plan, a goal, you’re going to be lost.
- If you want to master yourself, you must be honest with yourself.
First element of emotional intelligence is Self-awareness: The ability to recognise your own emotions, and how they affect your thoughts and actions.
Give yourself some time to think and complete the following exercise:
Knowing Yourself:
- What is a current challenge that leads to emotional tension?
- What feelings does that situation trigger?
- What are you thinking/saying to yourself?
- What are some new ways to build relationship in this situation?
- What positive outcome can be generated?
Transform Lives through Life Coaching
Like every other animal on the planet, humans are creatures of habit. Habit creeps into every aspect of our lives, from eating the same meals every night and going to the same bars every weekend, to jetting off on the same types of holiday every year. We sometimes think we’ve got the monopoly on what pleases us, and so replicate those experiences again, and again, and again, until they become routine. Consequently, we feel safe and comfortable, and perhaps content, but not necessarily fulfilled.
The problem with routines is that they can barricade you from experiencing new and enriching things, turning your life into an overly structured existence. Over time you can become reliant on them, to the point where venturing out of your comfort zone feels extremely intimidating. At its very worst this can result in a lifetime made up of years and years that all look exactly the same.
Breaking the Cycle
While travel broadens the mind, you don’t need to venture off on an exotic holiday to shake away your routine. Like anything in life, small incremental changes can be the most effective in the long run. Doing just one new thing per week can make your confidence in new experiences begin to snowball, giving you a more adventurous outlook on life. These things can be really simple too, for example:
- Taking the most scenic route to work, instead of the most efficient one. See how it makes you feel each morning.
- Visiting that museum or gallery a friend recommended. What better way to spend a couple of hours?
- Reading a book or watching a film that you wouldn’t usually pick. Try different authors or genres. Be open to recommendations, and let yourself be taken somewhere new.
- Going sightseeing in your own town or city. Many people have never seen their hometown’s best attractions. Act like a visitor and take an open top bus.
- Learning something new, or signing up for a course. Everyone has a skill or an interest they’ve always wanted to develop. Pursuing it can be incredibly rewarding.
- Trying something new and unusual on the menu. It could be the best meal you’ve ever had in your life. You won’t know unless you order it.
- Saying ‘Yes’ when friends or family invite you somewhere. Even if it doesn’t sound like your scene, you might be pleasantly surprised – especially if you’re in the company of people you love.
The Adventurer
When people think of being adventurous they often envision someone doing something thrilling, like mountain climbing, trekking through a jungle, or swimming with sharks. That isn’t the benchmark of an adventurous spirit, however. At its core, being adventurous is about being free from the boundaries of your comfort zone, being willing to push yourself into unknown territory, and being open to new things. It could be as simple as saying ‘yes’ to something new.
The most fulfilled people aren’t fulfilled because everything in their life is peachy; they’re fulfilled because they’re bold enough to grab everything life has to offer, without letting the fear of failure limit them. And whether it’s at the time or in hindsight, they view the negative experiences they encounter along the way as challenges and opportunities for growth – as opposed to something that should be avoided entirely. Cocooning yourself into a safe routine only hinders you from finding true fulfilment. As the saying goes “Those who don’t make mistakes don’t make anything”.
By embracing new experiences you’ll forge a more confident, fearless, and enriched version of yourself. Make this the year you break the boundaries of your routine, and approach life like one big adventure. With spring here and renewal in the air, there’s no better time to start.
Lucy has been struggling with a poor self-image for the past six years. She felt unattractive and strongly believed that men didn’t find her sexy. She had a successful career as a management consultant but could not stop feeling bad about herself. Through our sessions, we discovered that Lucy had a younger sister. This younger sister was the pretty one, the one who got all the boys, according to Lucy.
Although Lucy was more successful in her career, she believed her sister was accepted more by her parents because she was married and had provided them with their first grandchild the previous year. It was clear that Lucy had lost sight of what was important to her and was doing her self-image no favours by continually comparing herself negatively to her sister.
Here are some of the techniques we worked together in order for Lucy to start reconnecting with herself again:
1. Who Are You?
Take some time to write down who you are at the moment. Highlight your qualities, values and recognise anything that you see as negative about yourself. It might be that your negative beliefs about yourself only crop up in certain situations. If this is the case, understand why you feel more negative about yourself at these times.
2. Understand Why You Have To Change
Recognise how powerful your negative beliefs are about yourself have been so far in your life. It might be a bit depressing to begin with but note down how much these limiting beliefs have held you back so far. Don’t dwell on them: just recognise them and decide not to let this happen again.
3. Create A New Self-Image
Re-define who you want to be. Keep all of the good qualities that you have noted down in response to the “Who Are You?” question but take the negatives you have about yourself and turn them around into positive statements about yourself instead. Read this redefinition back to yourself every day for the next two weeks until you start acting like this person and making decisions based on this new completely positive person.
4. Positive Role Models
Find inspirational people and see how they behave. How do they talk about their lives? It’s more productive to admire and pick up qualities in people and add them to our own repertoire rather than comparing yourself negatively to people. Negative comparison is not constructive and makes you feel bad about yourself.
5. Visualisation
While you’re getting used to your new self-image start to visualise yourself as the new you. How will you deal with certain people and situations? Rehearse the new you and then actually behave like that person in real time situations.
6. Don’t Put Yourself Down
Observe how you talk about yourself. Don’t use sentences like ‘I’ve never been any good at …’ or ‘It only worked because I got lucky.’ By putting yourself down in front of others, you’re basically telling them you don’t value yourself so they shouldn’t either. If you find that you talk negatively about yourself then redefine your external dialogue. Replace negative talk with strong positive statements about yourself.
7. Make Yourself Feel Good
Once you’ve worked on your inner confidence, don’t undermine this by not dressing for success. Wear things that make you feel confident, or in Lucy’s case, sexy. Also, spend time on yourself. Go, to the hairdressers, gym, go for massages and eat the right food. Sounds simple but most of us just don’t do it. Looking after yourself tells you that you have respect for yourself!
If you enjoyed this article, please comment below and remember to share with your friends when you have a moment.
TRANSFORM LIVES THROUGH LIFE COACHING
As someone who is committed to making a positive and lasting difference myself, the topic of making a change and leaving your mark is one close to my heart. Being a change maker isn’t limited to a special handful of people; we can all go out and make a difference in our own special way. Having had the pleasure of working alongside so many fantastic Coaches and Trainers over the years I’ve noticed some common behaviours that have assisted them in leaving their dent in the universe.
- They commit to their passion
Change makers have an extreme level of commitment to their ‘why’, it’s what pulls them out of bed and drives them forward. For many their why is a passion that’s born from turning their ‘mess into their message’ providing them with inexhaustible levels of drive and determination to get out there align with their purpose and make things happen.
Some questions which can help you to align with your why are:
- What are the things I believe in most?
- What do you want I want to give back to the world?
- What would I do if I knew I couldn’t fail?
- They continually better themselves
Those who make an impact understand that their knowledge is never complete; they are always looking to learn more about themselves and the world around them so they can stretch past their limitations and offer the world their best. A way to get clarity around the areas they can improve is by conducting a personal SWOT analysis. Some questions to consider when drawing up a personal SWOT are:
Strengths
- What are my existing strengths?
- What do other people see as my strengths?
- Which achievements am I most proud of?
Weaknesses
- What areas of my life hold me back?
- Am I happy with my existing education and skills training?
- What habits or personality traits would I like to improve?
Opportunities
- Could I enlist the services of a Life Coach to accelerate my success?
- What healthy habits could I incorporate into my lifestyle?
Threats
- What beliefs/fears are holding me back?
- What wouldn’t happen if I didn’t make a change?
- They embrace feedback
Some of the most powerful change makers I’ve come across are open to feedback; many of them are open to constructive criticism in order to help them grow, be more effective and embrace any challenges that come their way. Change makers view feedback as fuel that helps them to strengthen their work and ideas. Joining a mastermind group or asking a trusted friend to provide you with feedback on your ideas is a great way for you to view things with a fresh perspective.
- They connect with other peopleMany change makers are driven by a desire to positively influence others, they understand the power of relationships and aren’t afraid to get out there and connect with others, they believe sharing their knowledge, skills and talents with others can provide both parties with valuable viewpoints and mutually beneficial relationships to reach their goals faster. Attending events on your topic of interest is a great way to connect with people who you may be able to build a good synergy with.5. They walk their talkChange-makers understand the importance of remaining congruent with their values and ensure their words match their actions. Knowledge is one thing but the application of it is another. Considering what areas of your life your words may not be matching your actions is a good way to start unpicking what could be holding you back from walking your talk. Working with an NLP practitioner is a great way to get some clarity on overcoming patterns of behaviour which could be holding you back from reaching your goals so that you can take action and live in your truth.6. They view the journey as the goal
Change makers understand that the journey is just as essential as the attainment of the goal. They have faith in the fact that everything they learn, experience and build along the way is a part of the big picture. This mentality helps them to remain persistent, view failure as a learning curve, and remain flexible in their approach; it is with this outlook that many of them are able to keep pushing forwards when the going gets tough. A change maker keeps going until they have achieved their mission.
7. They help others
Those who are committed to positively impacting the world are happy to help and support others along the way. They adopt a give before you get philosophy and understand that inspiring and uplifting others is the best way for them to make a meaningful impact to the lives of others. When you help others not only do you feel good about yourself, you’re able to pay it forward knowing that you’ve contributed to making the world a better place.
A change maker is someone who has a vision of the future that excites them to get out of bed in the morning and make a difference. When you create a vision that moves you to do things you’ve never done, you’ll find yourself in wonderful new places you’ve never been.
How do successful people think? What drives them? If you truly understand their belief systems, levels of commitment and positive attitudes toward life and integrate these ways of thinking into your own belief system – you should be able to succeed at anything you put your mind to.
- Live Your Life ‘On Purpose’
Professional public speakers will tell you that the time they feel most alive is when they are on stage, connecting with an audience. Having a sense of purpose in your life is the most important element of becoming a fully functioning person. The difference between living your life ‘on purpose’ and not is like night and day.
The latter consists of simply getting through the week with the least amount of problems while expending just enough effort to get by. When you live your life ‘on purpose’ however, your main concern is doing the job right. You love what you do, and it shows. Your conviction is as evident as it is persuasive.
People want to do business with you because they sense your commitment to giving your all. How do you live your life ‘on purpose’? – By finding a cause you believe in and creating a business around it, by focusing on providing value for others, the money will take care of itself.
- Take 100% Responsibility
In a society where people blame everything from their parents to the Government for their failure to get ahead in life, successful people refuse to buy into the mentality that says, “I could succeed if only it weren’t for……..” They realised that when you say someone or something outside of yourself is preventing you from succeeding, you’re giving away your power to that someone or something.
You’re saying, “You have more control over my life than I do!” Successful people don’t buy into this victim thinking. Rather, their personal credo is “if it’s to be, it’s up to me!” There are certain things in life you can’t control, such as nature, the past and other people.
But there are things you absolutely can control, such as your thoughts and your actions. Taking 100% responsibility for your life is one of the most empowering things you can do for yourself.
- Be Willing To Pay The Price
Wanting a big house, a luxury car or a million pounds in the bank is all very nice, but the problem is that practically everyone wants these things. The question then is, are you willing to pay the price to get them?
This is one of the major differences between the successful and the unsuccessful. Successful men and women find out what it’s going to cost to make their dream come true then they find a way to make it happen. Most importantly they don’t complain about the work it takes to achieve their dreams.
- Stay Focused
Every day we are bombarded with hundreds of tasks and messages which all compete for our time. This is why the ability to focus on your goal is so critical. Focusing requires giving up some things in the present because you know the time invested will pay off big time down the road.
Spend as much of your day as you can focusing on achieving your goals and dreams. Every day, ask yourself, “Is what I’m right doing now bringing me closer to my goal?” if it’s not, do something that will. Focusing is like any habit: the more you do it, the easier it gets.
- Never Give Up
It may sound simple, even obvious, but when you’re truly committed to achieving your goal, giving up isn’t even an option. You must be willing to do whatever it takes. In the mid – 1970’s, Dr. Wayne Dyer quit his job as a professor at Wayne State University to promote his new book, Your Erroneous Zones. However, no major talk show would book the then unknown Dyer.
Did he give up? Not on your life. He loaded his car from floor to roof with copies of his book, and then spent a year on the road, travelling from small town to small town and appearing on any radio or TV talk show that would have him. Once on the air he would give out the number of the local bookstore and say that his book was available there. After the interview he’d quickly drive over to that bookstore, where the manager would say:
“Oh, you’re Wayne Dyer? We’ve been getting lots of calls for your book!”
Dyer would reply, “Well, I have a case in the car. Would you like some?”
“Oh, yes! And would you sign some while you are here?”
By the end of the year, The Tonight Show was calling him. And by the end of the 1970’s, Your Erroneous Zones had become a number-one best-selling non-fiction book of the entire decade. This is what the power of perseverance can do for you.
- Plan For Achieving
Taking the time to write out an action plan or map for how you’re going to achieve your goals is one of the best ways to get there faster. Brian Tracey, one of America’s most successful business sales trainers and speakers, points out, “Goals that are not in writing are not goals at all. They are merely wishes or fantasies.”