Blog > Benefits of NLP Techniques in coaching

Benefits of NLP Techniques in coaching

So life didn’t turn out quite how you thought it would.

Your friends have alienated you.

Your family has left you.

Your job has fired you.

Your health is in decline.

Temptation and addiction has taken hold.

You have sought out behaviors designed to mask your depression.

Your bank account is dropping li, and the business end of a razor blade feels friendlier than all of this bombastic reality surrounding you. Then again, maybe you are one of the lucky ones. Maybe, you’ve lived a charmed life. Maybe the world has been at your fingertips, but even so, there is still something. One event or a chain of things that still to this day hinders your full potential. The bottom line is that something happened. Something, somewhere, has altered the intended trajectory of your life.

I have neither been the luckiest or unluckiest in life, and yet, life has been exceedingly difficult for me. I would love to delve into the personal sob story that has been the road behind me, but I think that it is important to recognize that it is behind me. I have developed a level of inner peace through pain, through heartbreak, through NLP and psychological study, and through commitment. I should also say that this process of trial, error, study, and repeat took me at least a decade. I can’t make a single promise that anything I have done to help myself can help you, but certainty of outcome yields no novelty.

If you are anything like me you will have tried to change your circumstance. You might have even sought professional counseling. However, nothing seems to stick. You might have even made changes, and, they may have seemingly worked for a time, however, inevitably, whatever was there before still rears its ugly head. You’ve got to do something, and maybe, for you, like it was for me, a life and death, get better or die, situation. If this is the case, let me urge you to fully explore every available option before making a rational decision.

So the stage is set, the lights are on, and you’re all ready to learn the secret inner theme, the thing that everyone around you seems to already know, which must have been nestled right under your nose the entire time. Well, it has been. Sorry, I know, I was really pissed off about it too. It’s about perspective and distance. Whatever chain of events has happened to you is only so much of the puzzle. The bottom line is and has always been your reactions to it. That isn’t fair, I know. It almost feels like victim blaming. How can you be held responsible for the actions of others against you, or even for blind dumb luck. Well you can’t, but you can be held responsible for all of your own actions. Now, this can become very tricky territory.

This is so tricky, and perhaps borderline inflammatory for a reason. I’m trying to elicit a feeling. Shame on me for telling you that it’s all your own stupid fault. I am to blame for writing such awful things that led you to think or feel a certain way, but aren’t you to blame your investment in my opinion, as evidenced by reading this page? My point is neither to upset you, nor to tell you not to trust. I wanted you to look at situation from a removed or meta perspective. The idea is that even the largest of things get smaller from afar.

The true jewel at the center of neuro-linguistic techniques is to help people create that distance for themselves so that they can make future decisions in a less reactionary way. To give an example of this I will tell you about a girl I helped in my living room shortly after graduating and returning to my hometown. She had some very serious family problems that she had been running from her whole life. I don’t intend on getting into too much detail, mostly because, I didn’t need to know what here problems were in order to help her gain escape those, still very present and very real, feelings.

I asked her to sit down and close her eyes. I gave a short speech that I will not repeat here in this form, because, giving everyone the keys into their own self conscious is mildly irresponsible, because, there is some real damage that can be done in there if you don’t know what you’re doing. The best explanation I can give here is that inner consciousness is VERY picky about words and phrases, and sometimes you can be unintentionally negative towards yourself, which can have farther reaching consequences than you might have intended.

Once we had done the dog and pony show of accessing the inner consciousness I asked her to play out those events. She, at once, began demonstrating physical discomfort. Then I asked her to go backwards ten feet and then ten more, and so forth until she seemed comfortable. I asked her to play it out and look at the events playing in front of her with distance. This allowed her gain what is called perspective. She, herself, found a way of learning what she needed to learn from the situation. This perspective allows you to bury the invasive feelings associated with an event without carrying the weight of those feelings with you everywhere.

So, while this is an example of helping someone with a specific event or series of events this kind of therapy can be applied to all kinds of life adjustments. The only thing you need to do is commit to the process and have a strong trust with your provider.

Stop holding yourself back, and go charge down the life you deserve.